It's
kind of ironic that a game called Zen
Pinball
could lead to such a degree of sensory overload; but it does.
The
pinball courses (if you will, “tables”) are easy to love. They're
bright and colourful, but also very loud and somewhat overpowering.
It's a game of extremes, where the game will tell you at one point
that you're “excellent,”
“fantastic”
or “amazing”
(every
2 seconds, mind you)… only to see your ball slip right through the
gap, to be followed by a deflating “ball
lost” -
which made me feel the sobering pain of failure all too quickly after
such a high. I've honestly never felt so bi-polar in my life.

A look at the Tesla table.
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Part
of my frustration stems from the fact that there's so much going on
in each of the four tables. Just like a real game of pinball, there
are countless neon markers with score-multipliers which get
illuminated after your ball crosses over them – or something like
that. There are also the target zones that can obviously lead to big
points if you complete a particular task. My main beef, however,
comes from the fact that the aforementioned tasks can be as simple as
“aim
for the idol's mouth”
or as confusing as “great
shot... now *muffle muffle muffle*... HURRY UP!”
There's
an indicator at the top of the screen that, theoretically, tells you
your goal, but the objective flashes so quickly that if you take the
time to read it, you'll surely lose your ball (or at least, I did).

A close up of the racing inspired V12 table.
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With
that being said, if you speak the language of pinball, you very well
could fall in love with this game. It's beautiful, it's creative, and
it's pinball. I just don't think it's going to bring any newcomers
into the genre.
There's
a multi-player option which left me very frustrated and dissatisfied.
It took me five tries to get into
a game,
and once I did I got left in the dust by some guy who reached 12
million points in like three minutes. By that point I probably had
upwards of barely two mill.
The
multi-player aspect works like a race. You can play with up to four
people and there's a progress bar in the top-left corner. I beat two
of the players in my latest attempt – but they had apparently
disconnected before the game even started. Connectivity is certainly
an issue.

A shot of the jungle styled Shaman table.
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But
maybe that's because pinball's supposed to be played solo in the
first place. Maybe the online leaderboards will keep you happy.
Either
way, the game sounds great. The music, effects, and narration are
unique to each of the four tables: You've got some calming, dark,
tribal drumming throughout play on “Shaman;” windpipe tunes
accompanying the Tomb
Raider-esque
“El Dorado;” driving guitar for the muscle-car themed “V12;”
or the epic tunes and old electrical sound effects while rocking the
scientific “Tesla” stage.
I'm
not sure if there's really enough here to keep anyone engaged with
pinball for the long haul. Zen
Pinball
carries the price tag of $10, so either way, I guess you're not
breaking the bank.
If
you like pinball it's probably worth the investment at the PS Store.
If you don't like pinball, you probably wouldn't have even considered
the purchase in the first place, and I don't think there's anything
here that will change your mind.

This is El Dorado. Watch out for booby traps.
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Sure,
there is downloadable content for more courses, but at the end of the
day you're still just trying to smack a ball with some paddles. It's
pinball. Plain and simple.
The
Verdict for me: Forget it.
Zack
Cooper is host of the radio show Got
Game
on The
FAN590