Comics / Comic Reviews / Marvel Comics

X-Men #4

By Andy Frisk
October 19, 2010 - 22:11

 “The idea of these bastards partying in my town is pissing me off.”                      -Cyclops (in reference to the vampires running wild in San Francisco)

“So do something.”
Emma Frost (in response to Cyclops’ being pissed off)

Yeah, like higher some new writers…just how bad is X-Men? The above exchange should suffice as a ‘nuff said…Wow; I had some high hopes for this series. Hopefully, the X-Men were going to be rescued from the doldrums they have been languishing in for about a decade now. This is not to be the case apparently, and sadly. Yeah, they are fighting a threat that isn’t born of the self enclosed world of mutants and their own squabbles amongst themselves (something I’ve lobbied for with regards to our merry mutants, especially in the new Uncanny X-Force), but vampires? Really?

Vampires are trendy though, and will probably help sell this book. Unfortunately, this storyline has had only one interesting moment thus far, and that moment occurred back on the first few pages of the first issue when a vampire suicide bomber blew himself up in broad daylight in downtown San Francisco. I really thought that we were going to get a little more of an intelligent tale…you know that socio-political soapbox type of allegory stuff I’m always going on about, but barring a few pages where Dracula’s son Xarus tries to convince Cyclops that vamps and mutants have much in common and should unite since they’re oppressed brothers and all that jazz…this storyline has gotten less intelligent and original with each issue. How many times have we seen the “Wolverine gone rogue” tale where he attempts to off the whole team while succumbing to his evil side (even if it all turns out to be a ploy on his part)? How many times have we seen the X-Men go up against overwhelming odds? How many times have we seen Cyclops stumble and bumble around in self doubt? We’ve seen these plots too many times, if you ask me. Again, while vampires might be all the rage, if they’re not treated intelligently (like in Let Me In), then the whole vampire shtick gets really old, really fast, just like X-Men is. Putting aside some witty banter between Blade, who’s joined up to help the X-Men rid San Fran of the vamps, and Angel over the a sorry performance by a garbage emo band that the vamps like and Blade’s apparent affinity for Lady Gaga (“And I said that I liked one Lady Gaga song. That doesn’t mean I want to-“) there's not much going on storywise that will engage the reader in any real way.

The only real redeeming quality of X-Men is the book’s artistic team. It is fantastic. Honestly, the X-Men haven’t looked this cool in a while. Every character is sexy to the max (how Emma Frost keeps that weird corset thing on and manages to not expose herself to everyone in the Marvel Universe every time she raises her arms, I’ll never know…). Wolverine’s claws are cool, and the X-Women and their female vampire enemies are scantily clad and well endowed. Actually, now that I think about it, this series is really a cheese and beef cake book. There’s nary a page without a provocative pose or skin tight costume. Speaking of provocative poses…and I’m dropping the sarcasm here... Do we really need a shot of Wolverine sitting spread legged on an easy chair surrounded by vamp chicks, one of which is on her knees gazing into his crotch as if she’s about to…well, you get the picture. Comics definitely aren’t for kids, but there’s a fine line between art and sensationalism. A shot like this is more like exploitation. Other than the large helpings of beefcake and cheesecake, Medina, Vlasco, and Gracia display an excellent command of anatomy, fight choreography, costume detail and realism, and some pretty good background detail (all aspects I look for and admire). I just wish they had a better storyline to illustrate...and a little more restraint, even if the shot is supposed to be some kind of inside joke like Power Girl's breast size was rumored to be. 

Overall, like I suggested before, the X-Men as characters and a concept are in need of a massive injection of originality, and they really need to get out of the world of closed, mutant-only concerns. They need to battle some other types of threats to humanity to prove their heroism along with bashing in the heads of some evil mutants once in a while. While wiping out a cadre of particularly nasty vampires will help, if this is how the story is going to unfold, I’m ready to fast forward to the next evil mutant threat…

 

Rating: 4 /10

Last Updated: August 31, 2023 - 08:12